November 1, 2021
Halloween has once again come and gone. November is a breath of fresh air, as we shift from a national focus on darkness to one of thankfulness.
My journey of learning how to navigate Halloween began with my Daughter’s first Halloween. We took her trick or treating, because, well… isn’t that what you do on October 31st. As I described in The Power of Christmas, my Mom loves the Holiday’s and always goes all out. Halloween was no exception. We just did what we did, without ever questioning why.
A short way into my journey of motherhood, the Lord started to open my eyes and was leading me to ask why in so many areas – food, holidays, entertainment, media, education… Halloween was no exception. In 2011, when our first born was just nine months old, my husband and I accompanied my older half-children trick or treating. Our baby girl was dressed as a beautiful flower – spotless and perfect! Her sweet little eyes had only ever seen beauty. Suddenly, I was caught off guard as she was surrounded in the darkness of Halloween. All I wanted to do was shield her from the world around us. I knew I couldn’t shield her forever, but surely I could do better than this!
The following year, our second baby was born. We brought him home from the hospital on October 31st, rejoicing in the light that God brought into our home. It was then that we knew we were being called to something different. The Lord was calling us to redeem October. How do we redeem October? By not conforming to the patters of the world (Rom 12:2). Avoiding and not conforming are two very different things. God never called us to avoid the world, just to not conform to it.
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. (Rom 12:2, NIV)
When my youngest turned two, we embraced the invitation to redeem October and celebrated our first Harvest Fest in conjunction with his birthday! As he has grown, so has harvest fest! That same year I weeded out my fall decorations and obediently got rid of everything with a Halloween theme. I had all the Halloween items boxed up and ready for the thrift store, when I felt a conviction to throw it all away. As I stood there in my garage contemplating the message I was receiving – I knew it was the Lord, and tossed it in the trash.
We managed to shelter our little ones from Halloween for many years. We didn’t live in a neighborhood that had trick or treaters, so my children didn’t know what they were missing. Harvest fest was our thing and we did it well! It wasn’t until their friends and cousins got older that they started to question us about the rumor they had heard. Could they really go door-to-door, and with three magic words (trick-or-treat), get their buckets filled with candy?
I found myself at the Lord’s feet, asking Him what to do. I didn’t get a clear answer, but I did get a clear picture of what Jesus would do. He would go out into the neighborhoods and shine light. Jesus wouldn’t conform to Halloween, but He also wouldn’t avoid it.
I never intended to shelter my children forever – just a short while. After all, they were born to shine light. I know that in order to shine light we have to be willing to go into dark places. Protecting our children from the world doesn’t teach them how to navigate it. Our job is to teach them how to be in the world but not of the world. They must be equipped!
19 If you belonged to the world, the world would love [you as] its own and would treat you with affection. But you are not of the world [you no longer belong to it], but I have chosen you out of the world. And because of this the world hates you. (John 15:19, AMP)
My husband and I don’t want our children to avoid darkness or be afraid of it. We simply want them to recognize it for what it is, and to know that our God is greater. We want them to be confident in their identity as followers of Christ, and equip them in understanding the expansive power that is within them. I pray that they would have the eyes of Elisha to see that “those who are for us are far greater than those who are against us”.
“Do not be afraid, for those who are with us are greater than those who are with them.” (2 Kings 6:16, NASB)
That first year of trick or treating, the children had fun wandering around in costumes after dark with their cousins. And to be honest – so did I. What wasn’t fun was the large buckets of candy we returned home with. It made the dietitian in me cringe. As you can imagine they wanted to go back the following year, and the year after that… But they get it. How do I know? Because they ask intelligent questions like “what do black cats have to do with Halloween?” They have learned to ask why!!
So I know Jesus would go door-to-door and shine light. What I don’t know… is what He would do with ALL that candy!?
Too Much of a Good Thing
Along with helping our children wisely navigate the darkness of Halloween, we also have to help them unveil self-control with all the candy they get. This year our batch weighed in at a total of six pounds! Six pounds of candy! Before we went they had agreed to sell it back to me for $0.25/ounce, but once it was in their sticky little hands… they couldn’t seem to let it go. Sugar is sticky stuff!
What I do know is that depriving them of candy will not teach them. Again, my job isn’t to shelter them, but rather to equip them. Halloween presents incredible teaching opportunities. What is a kid to do with six pounds of candy?! Let’s get real y’all… they certainly shouldn’t eat it all! But they do need to learn how to wisely enjoy it.
Growing up, my mom always had bite size pieces of candy in bowls on the counter. My brother and I would have a little here and little there… because it was always available. Our friends on the other hand would come over and empty the bowls, taking handful after handful. I am not looking to raise bowl emptiers, but children who wisely exercise self-control. Candy is a good warm up for the temptations of life. We can’t expect to shelter them from it, and hope that one day they will just know what to do. It is our job to gradually expose our children to the world and equip them while they are still safe under our wings.
So… what do we do?
After weighing their six pounds of treasures, I had them pour it all out and group it by type – 100 twix in this corner, 50 M&M’s in this corner, 10 Twizzlers here, 5 Sour Patch there, and so on. Then we did a taste test and ranked our favorites from 1-10. The first night we only made it through six candies before my little boy said he was gonna be sick if he didn’t stop. I didn’t have to tell them to stop – they had had enough. Today they only sampled about another six before they threw in the towel. They had found their favorites and handed all the rest over. They each got $8, and I sent the surrendered batch to work with my husband (though I must admit that the dietitian in me was tempted to throw it out with the Halloween decorations).
I still have candy in the house. I don’t exactly have it on the counter like my Mom, but it is in the pantry and they are welcome to it anytime (within reason). The candy I make available is free from food dye and unidentifiable ingredients. Yes, it is still sugar… but at least I can pronounce the ingredients. My hope is that they are satisfied and won’t be enamored by candy. I pray that God will guide them to “think clearly and exercise self-control” in all areas of their life (1 Pet 1:13). The Bible teaches us “when you discover something sweet, don’t overindulge and eat more than you need, for excess in anything can make you sick of even a good thing (Prov 25:16). This is a great scripture to memorize during the month of October with our children.
So prepare your minds for action and exercise self-control. (1 Pet 1:13, NLT)
When you discover something sweet, don’t overindulge and eat more than you need, for excess in anything can make you sick of even a good thing (Prov 25:16, TPT).
We are raising children who will learn to ask why; who will think clearly and exercise self-control; who will be equipped to live in the world, yet not be of the world; and who will shine light into dark places. If we can teach them to navigate Halloween wisely, they will learn much! Our success can begin with a simple prayer. Open the eyes of my heart and my children’s heart Lord! “A prayer for vision is where the victory begins (Priscilla Shirer, Armor of God Study).”
The Parenting to Impress website has some other good ideas on what to do with all your Halloween candy.