October 7, 2021 – Thursday
I have had to put school on hold for a few days. My husband and I are just getting back in town from a three day getaway to New Mexico. My husband’s boss invited us to join him and his wife for a spa getaway. Tough it felt like the last thing I needed to do in my attempt to catch up, it was still so rejuvenating and refreshing! Getting away without the kids isn’t something we do often, who I am kidding… it isn’t something we do hardly ever. I know we probably should… but, right or wrong, it just hasn’t happened.
I am blessed my sweet mom was here from Texas to watch the kids while we were away. My daughter cried and cried the first night. I have been in her shoes, missing the very person she was with. There have been times that being away from my mom felt unbearable. Her pain was familiar. And my mom misses her mother daily, though she has been gone for over 20 years. It is hard to be miles away from those we love most. I so wanted to rescue my daughter from her sadness, but I know she is ready to be nudged out of her comfort zone a little. The distance was beneficial to us both.
I was experiencing a homesickness of my own. I was homesick for the place I was – the place I once called home. Being back in New Mexico made me miss it even more. The familiar smells of the desert, the majesty of the mountains that border the horizon, the taste of the red and green chile, the warm sunshine, and the dark adobe houses that welcome you with a bright turquoise door, like the smile of a friend inviting you in. Being home as a visitor… my husband coined the term “here sickness”. Whether you are homesick or here sick… you are blessed. To miss something deeply is to value and treasure it.
The hugs I received when we returned were priceless. Distance makes the heart more grateful. I thought they would never let go. I thought I would never let go… but I am raising these beautiful children to soar. It is in the letting go that we learn to fly.