Joy in the Stretching

January 6, 2022 – Thursday

Joy in the Stretching

Praise the Lord for His goodness!  The lemons of yesterday, breast biopsies and no heat, made the sweetest lemonade.  I refused to allow them to make me pucker and pout.  Instead I chose joy.  There were times it wasn’t easy and my mind wanted to travel down the darkest most familiar path of worry.  Yet I refused, time and time again.  Did I worry a little? Yes.  But did I persevere? Yes!  As I sat in the sterile room, my breast in compression, awaiting biopsy I was uncomfortable.  I was uncomfortable about the needle.  I was uncomfortable about the procedure.  I was uncomfortable about the results.  Being stretched is never comfortable -especially when it is your breast.  Those of you who have had a mammogram know what I am talking about.  Biopsy is breast compression plus needle.  Double whammy.

As we sit in a place of stretching… we have a choice.  Will we allow our mind to travel down every possible dark path of what if, doubt and worry it can find?  Or will we choose to focus on and trust God and pray for a heavenly perspective.  My first line of defense is to decree health and not come into agreement with sickness.  After that I lay it all at God’s feet and trust Him with the rest.  It is easier said than done.  It has taken years of stretching and practice.  I am not always good at it, but I am getting better.  I am paving new paths of joy, trust, and peace to travel down in lieu of the darkest valley.

Our brains have been created with the amazing capacity to remap pathways and neural connections.  This is known as neural plasticity.  Simply put, we are not at the mercy of our thoughts and experiences.  We can rewire our brains and alter our response to events that typically create a fight or flight response.

My beloved pastor at my church in Colorado initially introduced me to the concept of rewiring my brain.  He recommended the teachings by Dr. Caroline Leaf.  Dr. Leaf is a Christian neuroscientist whose passion is teaching people about the power of the mind to change their brain.  Her teachings are easy to understand, powerful, and life changing.   I have a link to those resources below.

“You are not a victim.  You can control your reactions.  You do have a choice.” ~ Switch on Your Brain, Dr. Caroline Leaf

I initially read Dr. Leaf's books back in 2018 when I was going through a period of intense anxiety.  I had never experienced anxiety to this level before and was at a complete loss on how to regain control of my thoughts.  With the help of my pastor, praying and supportive friends, Dr. Leaf’s teaching, a breathing coach, and anti-anxiety medication, I was on the road to recovery.  It was a painful season of stretching that was transformative.

There is so much more I could write about that season of my life and hope to get to that one day.  But for now… let’s get back to the stretching…

As I sat in the compression, waiting for the radiologist to examine the image and locate the place of biopsy, my thoughts wandered.  Time and time again I lassoed them up and redirected them.  As the radiologist approached I took a deep breath.  What happened next stunned me.  She told me that she couldn’t find the place of concern and that there would be no need for a biopsy today.  She apologized for the inconvenience and told me I could go home.  She recommended I come back in six months for follow up.  Praise God!  In my heart I knew it wasn’t anything concerning, but fear was screaming at me telling me otherwise.  I feel so thankful for God’s wisdom to identify anxiety and fear for what they are, and for the confidence and courage to face each challenge with joy.

On my way home I decompressed at the library picking up the Andy Griffith movies I had put on hold.  They had been free on Prime and we were having so much fun as a family watching these old shows together.  As of January 1 they are no longer free.  We are thankful the library is well stocked on Andy Griffith.  I then stopped by the used books for purchase and found so many!  Our home library continues to grow.  An over-abundance of books is part of the reason we spent so much of our Christmas break reorganizing.  We have to make space for the books!

That afternoon I got home to a warm house (the heat was fixed) and tender hug from husband.  Lemonade!!

Since December 31th, I have been journeying through this season of stretching.  It was only six days praise God (I have been stretched for much longer periods).  But without stretching there is no growth.  It isn’t the destination that God is after, it is the journey.  How we journey matters!

No matter what the stretching in your life, the outcome is extravagant, like a limousine.  Whatever you are facing – you can find the joy.  Even when it’s hard.   Fake it till you make it.  Skip the woe is me path and head down the road less traveled.  Maybe even start with serving others.  This less traveled path will make all the difference.

 

Resources:

VIDEOS

How too Detox Your Brain - Dr Caroline Leaf

 

BOOKS

Joy in Serving

January 5, 2022, Wednesday

Joy in Serving

As I tiptoed downstairs early this morning, I quickly realized something was different.  It was so cold in the house.  The heat register read 59 degrees with a note from my husband that read “something has gone wrong, will call for service today”.  I turned on our propane fireplace and our double oven to try and take off the chill.    Yesterday it was 45 degrees.  Today with wind chill it feels like -13.  Oh heat! Why such timing?  Hopefully tapping into abundant joy brings warmth.

Yesterday I had my second mammogram and ultrasound.  The results indicated a biopsy.  The radiologist says he can’t see the spot of concern good enough to classify it.  So… here we go I guess.  A part of me wants to say no! It’s nothing.  Scrap the biopsy.  The other part of me just wants to surrender to God and put my trust in the doctors He has placed on my path.  I think I will go with option B – surrender and trust.  Though running from it all sounds good too.  The problem with running and not facing something is the storm we encounter.  Much like Jonah on the ship when he ran from what God called Him to face.  Running is never the answer.  We must simply take the next right step.

Today, I turned to Philippians in the Passion Translation.  The title: A Heavenly Letter of Joy!  I love that!

We now know we can and should find joy in suffering, and that gratitude plays a role in finding joy.  Knowing about joy and receiving it are two different things.  We must not only believe, we must also receive.  Receiving requires active participation.  Believing is just the beginning.

As I proceed to chapter 2 today, I read that there is joy in serving.  Immediately my brain says go big or go home.  Yet I have so much on my plate today, I can’t fathom how I am going to serve today.  I know I live in a world that needs Jesus and that the opportunities to serve are endless.   But today Lord?  How?  It is there I feel His familiar whisper… there are so many to serve right within the walls of your home.  We can serve our children and our husband, and do it well.  The key isn’t how elaborately we serve, it is simply that we serve.

It is easy to be selfish when life is giving you lemons.  It is easy to put on a sour face, feel sorry for yourself and expect others to serve you because of the hardship you have been dealt.  A woe is me attitude will not result in joy.  It will result in a selfish pursuit of expecting others to serve us, and disappointment when they don’t meet our expectations.  The longing we have to be served, can only be satisfied through serving others.  It is through the selfless pursuit of serving that we find joy!

Be free from pride-filled opinions, for they will only harm your cherished unity. Don’t allow self-promotion to hide in your hearts, but in authentic humility put others first and view others as more important than yourselves. Abandon every display of selfishness. Possess a greater concern for what matters to others instead of your own interests. (Phil 2:3-4, TPT)

Today I will trust God and focus on joy.  I will serve others with a joyful heart.  I will smile.  I will refuse to worry.  I will pray for others.  I will tell my husband thank you for being home to watch the children and fix the heat.  Today I will choose the path the less traveled.  The path with scenic views and heavenly perspectives.  Today I will choose joy.  Joy in the trial.  Joy through serving.  Today I will paint myself in revival and lift the mood of our home!

Joy in Suffering

January 4, 2022 – Tuesday

Joy in Suffering

Yesterday morning, as I was writing about gratitude and joy, I heard the pitter patter of footsteps upstairs – a natural timer that tells me it is time to shift gears.  I greeted my children with smiles and prepared to start our day.  Over a yummy breakfast of Baked Pancakes, we resumed our Armor of God study.  As part of the study, the children had to look up various verses in the Bible.  I was helping my youngest find Ephesians, as he quickly paged backwards through the four chapters of Philippians.  The bold titles of Philippians flashed before my eyes: JOY IN GIVING, JOY IN BELIEVING, JOY IN SERVING, JOY IN SUFFERING.  I wanted to pause there, God had just given me the blue prints to joy!  Yes – there is joy in gratitude.  But here were four other layers the Lord was highlighting (all because we were in the Word)!!  But my son was moving on to Ephesians full steam ahead.  Philippians would have to wait.

I am finally able to open my Bible and get back to the blueprints the Lord laid before me yesterday.  This comes at a good time.  Today I am going back in for a follow up mammogram and ultrasound (Joy in Revival).  Anxiety has been shouting at me since I first got my results on Friday, December 31st.  Thank goodness I was knee deep in painting and covered from head to toe in the color of revival!  I had a choice over the past 4 days.   Was I going to choose joy or was I going to let worry consume me?  The quote from Corrie Ten Boom has been booming in my mind…

“Worrying is carrying tomorrow's load with today's strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” ― Corrie Ten Boom

Today was coming no matter the path I traveled.  All roads were leading to Tuesday.  The choice I had to make was which path I would take.  Would I take the scenic road with a heavenly perspective full joy, or choose the valley of the shadow of death ridden with weeds of worry and fear?  The latter is a familiar well-worn path with deep ruts from many years of travel.  My mind knows that path well and is comfortable with the familiar scenery.  Over the past decade I have been working diligently to pave new paths.  They are slowly forming ruts as well.  The old road of worry is no longer well maintained due to lack of travel.  There are now obstacles in the way.  Trees have fallen across the path. Mud slides have filled in the ruts.  New grass is growing making the path obscure.  I can still choose that path if I want.  Fortunately I don’t want to.  For years I didn’t even know there were other paths available.  But I have seen those paths and they are beautiful.  They are indeed less traveled.  It is always the road less traveled that makes the difference.

As I embarked on the four day wait to today… I literally had to refuse to travel down the path of worry.  I would shout NO! I refuse to travel down this road.  I will take the path less traveled!  I will choose joy!  Worrying about tomorrow today will do me no good.  This is easier said than done.  But it is said.  It is said time and time again in the Bible.  We are called to cast our worries on Jesus (1 Pet 5:7), to refuse to worry about tomorrow (Matt 6:34), to be joyful always and give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thess 5:16-18).  This is just the tip of the ice burg.

Pour out all your worries and stress upon him and leave them there, for he always tenderly cares for you. Be well balanced and always alert, because your enemy, the devil, roams around incessantly, like a roaring lion looking for its prey to devour. Take a decisive stand against him and resist his every attack with strong, vigorous faith. For you know that your believing brothers and sisters around the world are experiencing the same kinds of troubles you endure. 10 And then, after your brief suffering, the God of all loving grace, who has called you to share in his eternal glory in Christ, will personally and powerfully restore you and make you stronger than ever. Yes, he will set you firmly in place and build you up. 11 And he has all the power needed to do this—forever! (1 Peter 5:7-11, TPT)

34 Refuse to worry about tomorrow, but deal with each challenge that comes your way, one day at a time. Tomorrow will take care of itself.” (Matt 6:34, TPT)

16 Let joy be your continual feast. 17 Make your life a prayer. 18 And in the midst of everything be always giving thanks, for this is God’s perfect plan for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thess 5:16-18, TPT)

God has given me the blueprints of joy in the four chapters of Philippians.  This is the road less traveled.  Today's path... joy in suffering.

Joy in Suffering:

We discover happiness when times are easy.  We discover true joy in Jesus.

In Paul’s letter to the Philippians, he is writing from prison as he awaits trial.  He is teaching about joy while he is in prison.  Perhaps he was preaching to himself what he knew to be true, but needed a reminder of.  Perhaps that is what I too am doing today.

 

Here is what I know to be true:

The enemy comes to steal and kill and destroy.  Jesus came to give us life in abundance (John 10:10).

10 A thief has only one thing in mind—he wants to steal, slaughter, and destroy. But I have come to give you everything in abundance, more than you expect—life in its fullness until you overflow! (John 10:10, TPT)

I am a daughter of the King (2 Cor 6:18).

I will be a true Father to you, and you will be my beloved sons and daughters,” says the Lord Yahweh Almighty.  (2 Cor 6:18, TPT)

By His stripes I am healed (Isa 53:5).

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. (Isa 53:5, KJV)

No weapons formed against me will prosper (Isa 54:17).

But I promise you, no weapon meant to hurt you will succeed, and you will refute every accusing word spoken against you.  This promise is the inheritance of Yahweh’s servants, and their vindication is from me,” says Yahweh. (Isa 54:17, TPT)

When I stand firm on God’s promises and trust Him with the details, I can be unshakable (Matt 7:24-25).

24 “Everyone who hears my teaching and applies it to his life can be compared to a wise man who built his house on an unshakable foundation. 25 When the rains fell and the flood came, with fierce winds beating upon his house, it stood firm because of its strong foundation. (Matt 7:24-25, TPT)

 

As I journey through the waiting, I choose to take this opportunity to experience the greatest joy that I can.  If I can tap into the endless fountain of abundant joy in the trial… finding it in the day-to-day will become second nature.  I feel like the Lord is saying this isn’t about the destination, but the journey.  How I journey through this matters.  Over the next days – my goal is to experience the abundant joy of Jesus.

My fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties, see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can! For you know that when your faith is tested it stirs up in you the power of endurance. And then as your endurance grows even stronger, it will release perfection into every part of your being until there is nothing missing and nothing lacking. (James 1:2-4, TPT)

Joy in Gratitude!

January 3, 2022 – Monday

Joy in Gratitude

I’m happy because I am thankful;
not thankful because I’m happy.

Joy is a byproduct of gratitude. We become increasingly joyful as we become increasingly thankful. To focus on joy we must focus on gratitude. The children and I have gratitude journals. Much to my chagrin, I have become lax at mine. As they grew more independent over the past year, they would sit down (in the dark red parlor room) to do their journals as part of their morning independent work. This would give me time to clean up the breakfast dishes or get dressed for the day. But I miss sitting and focusing on gratitude together. Those were precious moments I long to regain.

What we focus on we magnify. Who wouldn’t benefit from gratitude magnified? As we begin this New Year, I am making a commitment to dust off my gratitude journal and magnify thanksgiving alongside my children.

Another really fun way to journal gratitude is daily beauty walks. I have done this in years past, though it is not my current practice. The kids and I would head out into nature and search for something beautiful. We would then capture it in a photo and share it on social media. Even in the dead of winter – we would find the most extraordinary beauty.

Whatever the ailment – nature is the remedy.

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Joy in Revival!

January 1, 2022 – Saturday

Joy in Revival!

Chickens.  They are all fun and games until the wind chill is -20 degrees.  Enough said.

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My favorite way to begin a new year is by listening to what the Lord is saying about the upcoming year.  This year I hear Him saying revival and authentic joy!  As we prepare to literally cover our parlor room walls in the color of “revival” I know this word is deeper than my paint can, and the year will reveal God’s truth one brush stroke at a time.

These words are timely.  The results from my mammogram were sent to my inbox yesterday and are indicative for a follow-up.  Ugh.  Joy is put to the test right out of the gates!

What strikes me about joy is that it is a choice we make despite our circumstances.  Joy is supernaturally empowered, and isn’t something we tap into by might or strength (Zech 4:6).  Authentic joy is dependent on Jesus.  Happiness is dependent on our circumstances.  Happiness can be found in paint colors.  When our identity is rooted in happiness it is shakable.  When a child takes a sharpie to our newly painted walls, happiness crumbles.  Authentic joy comes when our identity is firmly rooted in Christ and in His love for us.  This my friends is joy unshakable.  Its source?  Love.  Authentic joy is not dependent on “marker free” walls.  If we wait for our circumstances (or our parlor room) to be perfect, we may find happiness, but it is fragile and fleeting.  Joy on the other hand is a firm foundation that comes from Christ alone, and His deep love for us.

‘Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ says the Lord of hosts. (Zech 4:6, NKJV)

“Everyone wants to be happy; we make chasing this elusive ideal a lifelong pursuit: spending money, collecting things, and searching for new experiences. But if happiness depends on our circumstances, what happens when the toys rust, loved ones die, health deteriorates, money is stolen, and the party’s over? Often happiness flees and despair sets in.  In contrast to happiness stands joy. Running deeper and stronger, joy is the quiet, confident assurance of God’s love and work in our lives – that he will be there no matter what!  Happiness depends on happenings, but joy depends on Christ.”  (NIV Life Application Study Bible)

Joy and revival go hand-in-hand.  The definition of revival is to return to life or to recover it (Websters 1828).  Jesus came to give us life and to give it abundantly (John 10:10).  When we start to live life abundantly through Christ – we start to experience revival.  To revive our life, or to live life abundantly, we must first learn to tap into the joy that is found through Christ alone.  His joy is our strength (Neh 8:10), and is exceedingly abundantly above anything we could ever ask or imagine (Eph 3:20).

Revive: To return to life; to recover life. (Websters 1828)

I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. (John 10:10, ESV)

And do not be worried, for the joy of the Lord is your strength and your stronghold.” (Neh 8:10, AMP)

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, (Eph 3:20, NKJV)

Our souls are longing for what our spirit knows is inherently ours.  Joy is our birthright.  As sons and daughters of the King – we have access to the abundance of Christ (Phil 4:19). Yet, so many of us are searching for authentic joy through happiness.  Joy can only be found in discovering Jesus’ love for us, and that joy is the strength that revives us.

I am convinced that my God will fully satisfy every need you have, for I have seen the abundant riches of glory revealed to me through Jesus Christ! (Phil 4:19, TPT)

As I am writing this, the song “Lookin’ for Love” by Johnny Lee is playing on repeat in my mind, while the Lord reminds me of my writing "Holding Out for a Hero". I invite you to join me there...

Lookin’ for Love (Johnny Lee, 1980)

CHORUS
I was lookin' for love in all the wrong places
Lookin' for love in too many faces
Searchin' their eyes
Lookin' for traces of what I'm dreaming of
Hoping to find a friend and lover
I'll bless the day I discover
Another heart lookin' for love

VERSES
I spent a lifetime lookin' for you
Single bars and good time lovers were never true
Playing a fools game, hopin' to win
Tellin' those sweet lies and losin' again

I was alone then, no love in sight
I did everything I could to get me through the night
I don't know where it started or where it might end
I turned to a stranger just like a friend

You came knockin' on my heart's door
You're everything I've been looking for

No more lookin' for love in all the wrong places
Lookin' for love in too many faces
Searchin' their eyes
Lookin' for traces of what I'm dreaming of
Now that I found a friend and lover
God bless the day I discover
You, oh you, lookin' for love

 

You are still here… hope you are in awe of those lyrics.  Now really... let’s hop on over to “Holding Out for a Hero”.

You can come back… and when you do… take a moment to soak in the beautiful truth of the song Build My Life by Pat Barrett – yet another love song.

Primer – I’m in Love with You

December 30, 2021 - Sunday

This morning, in the midst of our remodel, I decided to squeeze in a routine mammogram before the turn of the year.  Our deductible is met and I am overdue.  As I was out and about, I decided to shop for lights for our parlor room.  When I returned my husband had concealed the red walls with primer. “I’m in love! I’m in love! And I don’t care who knows it!” (You’ll have to excuse me – I am still coming off the joy of the Christmas season.  Elf anybody?).  You know you have made a good decision when you fall in love with primer.  What a breath of fresh air from the dark reds.  It is almost as if a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.  How can color do that?

Speaking of color.  We have decided on Colonial Revival Gray (by Sherwin Williams).  I am all about revival!  And oh how I love the history of Colonial America.  Meet my perfect color.  The color is as lovely as its name.

Tomorrow we paint!

Parlor Room and Pound Cake

December 28, 2021 – Tuesday

The Christmas season has come and gone.  My sweet husband is home for a week with us.  This is the first time we have had a staycation since we moved to Midwest. There is something so refreshing about being home.  At least for me.  My husband on the other hand, may need a vacation from his staycation.  He is generously tackling my honey-do list in the school room, and for that I am SO thankful!

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The room appears to have been originally designed as a parlor room, complete with dark red stripped walls and a gaudy chandelier.  Along one wall is an amazing nook where our beloved 1919 player piano resides – right at home in the late 19th century motif of the room.

Historically, the parlor room was typically set apart for formal occasions, conversations, and entertaining acquaintances.  It was the mothers pride and joy and not to be defiled by her children.  Think Farmer Boy.  You remember the scene.  Mother and father are out of town and Alice wants to make a pound-cake and eat it in the parlor room.  Eliza Jane, the oldest and most responsible sister, tells her ‘you’ll do no such thing… you know the parlor’s just for company’.

"That day they made ice-cream again, and they ate the last cake. Alice said she knew how to make a pound-cake. She said she’d make one, and then she was going to go sit in the parlor.  Almanzo thought that wouldn’t be any fun. But Eliza Jane said: “You’ll do no such thing, Alice. You know very well the parlor’s just for company.” ~ Farmer Boy, Laura Ingalls Wilder

We have never eaten pound cake in our parlor room… but that’s only because I have never made pound cake.  Contrary to Mrs. Wilder’s home, our parlor room is the children’s space.  There are days I do dream of making the parlor room all mine…  No pound cake!  No children!  No pets!  A room where I can go to find refuge from the chaos.  Where I can enter without stepping on Legos, sit in a chair without first clearing it off, or read a novel without looking around at all that needs to be tidied.  I would sip tea with girlfriends and play chess with my husband.  I would sit at my writing desk and scribble notes for the most wonderful stories…  Alas, that is not my season.  Nor do I want it to be.  The truth is that I love my season and the energy my children bring into our home.  I wouldn’t have it any other way!  There will be days for a parlor of sorts I suppose.  But then I will miss my school room terribly.

After some deliberation, my husband and I have decided to change the paint and light fixture, all while working to maintain some of the parlor charm.  The term parlor was originally derived from the French verb parler, which means to speak.  Therefore a parlor room is a room in which to have conversations (1).   I love that!  Isn’t that what school should be?  A place where we converse and share ideas.  A place where children are seen and heard.    A place where friends gather.  Perhaps, after all, a parlor room is the perfect school room.

  1. https://www.americanheritage.com/parlor

 

Creating an Environment of Thanksgiving in our Homes

My nine-year-old daughter has an amazing gift and love for endlessly asking questions. What is your favorite color?  Favorite day of the week?  Favorite animal?  Favorite number?  She recently asked me what my favorite month was, and after giving it some thought I settled on November.  There are so many things I love about November.  November is strikingly beautiful!  I love the cool fall weather and change of the season, the cozy nights by the fire with a cup of tea and a good book, the brightly colored trees, and the crunch of leaves below my feet.  What I love best though is the celebration of thankfulness.  As we journey from a celebration of darkness in October, to a celebration of gratitude in November, November seems to shine even brighter.  Perhaps the contrast makes the latter more stunning; perhaps the latter simply is more stunning. 

As the cold November wind blows the final leaves from the trees, the absence of the leaves allows us to see beyond, to what we couldn’t see before, and our vision becomes enhanced.  Similarly, the November wind of thankfulness gusts through our lives, and enhances our vision.  Gratitude by nature enhances vision by adjusting focus.  I have heard it said many times, “What we focus on, we magnify”.  November blesses us with the opportunity to focus on, and therefore, to magnify gratitude. 

Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt His name together. (Ps 34:3, NKJV)

When we gratefully acknowledge the visible everyday gifts, we open our eyes to God’s goodness in our lives. A posture of gratitude allows us to “see the visible, which makes us understand the invisible” (Rom 1:20).  Thanksgiving, by definition, is grateful acknowledgment of benefits or favors, especially to God (www.dictionary.com).  Thanksgiving begins with acknowledgement.  In order to understand this fully, we have to understand an important truth.  Everything we have is from God (Ps. 24:1).  We cannot acknowledge the Giver if we do not know the source. 

The earth belongs to the Lord. And so does everything in it. The world belongs to him. And so do all those who live in it. (Ps 24:1, NIRV)

 Opposition to truth cannot be excused on the basis of ignorance, because from the creation of the world, the invisible qualities of God’s nature have been made visible, such as his eternal power and transcendence. He has made his wonderful attributes easily perceived, for seeing the visible makes us understand the invisible. So then, this leaves everyone without excuse. (Rom 1:20, TPT)

In a world of entitlement, I think we would all agree that there is space for more gratitude.   Two day shipping, 1-click shopping, pressure cooked meals, high speed internet, instant text messaging, and movies on demand, all reinforce a message that we are entitled to what we want, when we want it.  We are blessed to live in a time such as this, but we must pair these benefits and privileges with the wisdom gratitude imparts.  Gratitude shifts our focus by allowing us to first acknowledge the gift, and in turn, express our appreciation to the Giver.  By better understanding the definitions of these terms it will help us to define the solution.

Entitled: having a right to certain benefits or privileges (Merriam-Webster); real or perceived.

Grateful: to be appreciative of benefits received (Merriam-Webster).

Thanksgiving: grateful acknowledgment of benefits or favors, especially to God (www.dictionary.com).

Entitlement is simply a right to certain benefits, whereas gratitude is an appreciation of those benefits.  Entitlement and gratitude are designed to go hand-in-hand, which is the nature of thanksgiving – the act of acknowledging our benefits and favors with gratitude, especially to God. 

“I hope my child grows up to be entitled,” said no mom ever!  As parents, if there is one thing we would all agree on, I believe, it is that we want to raise grateful children. In a world where there is so much division, gratitude is a common denominator that unites us.  Raising grateful children may feel like a daunting task, but be encouraged, we can!  We become transformed by the renewing of our mind.  How do we renew our minds – we can begin with a focus on thanksgiving.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. (Rom 12:2, NASB)

Entitlement alone is not the problem plaguing our nation, but rather, entitlement paired with the absence of appreciation and gratitude.  There are many things we are entitled to.  Simply by being born in America we are entitled to freedom to worship as we wish, the right to vote, the right to choose how we educate our children (public, private, homeschool), “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness”… The list of our privileges in America is extensive.  That truth alone should make us grateful. 

Even greater than any privilege we may be entitled to on this earth, are the unlimited privileges and benefits of being children of God. We are abundantly entitled!  The world seems to consistently get the right message with the wrong interpretation.  We got the message that we are entitled – we just misinterpreted it.  To see how we missed the mark on COVID click here.  We are entitled to a Kingdom full of blessings because of a Savior who adores us!  How do we tap into the truth of entitlement?  Gratitude. How do we do it? We shout for joy to Lord, and we enter His gates with Thanksgiving (Ps 100)! 

Psalm 100
A psalm. For giving grateful praise.
Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.
2 Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.
Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Everything we have, that is good, is from God (Jm 1:17).  When God opens His generous hand, it is full of blessings, satisfying the longings of every living thing (Ps 145:16).  God loves us so much that he calls us His children, and as His children, we are heirs to His promises (1 John 3:1, Gal 3:29). 

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17, NIV)

When you open your generous hand, it’s full of blessings, satisfying the longings of every living thing. (Ps 145:16, TPT)

Look with wonder at the depth of the Father’s marvelous love that he has lavished on us! He has called us and made us his very own beloved children. (1 John 3:1, TPT)

And now that you belong to Christ, you are the true children of Abraham. You are his heirs, and God’s promise to Abraham belongs to you. (Gal 3:29, NLT)

Let’s ponder the thought that perhaps we do want to raise entitled children, entitled children who are equipped with the wisdom gratitude imparts. We are raising children of God who are entitled to all the blessings of the Kingdom.   That’s a big darn deal y’all!  Our goal should be to raise children who know who they are, who their Father is, and how much He loves them.  Gratitude imparts wisdom.  By acknowledging and appreciating our gifts and knowing their true source, the atmosphere in our homes will shift. 

The bondage of entitlement comes from the absence of gratitude.  As gratitude increases, the bondage to entitlement decreases.  The result… thanksgiving! 

I recently heard it said, “The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago, the next best time is now”.  This really spoke to my heart because our family just moved to a new property, and we inherited very few established trees.  We can’t help but question why the people before us didn’t plant any trees when they moved in 15 years ago?!   I get it, starting with little saplings feels like such a long-term investment, and may often feel like it is hardly worth the effort, especially if your residence is temporary.  But the truth is, if we don’t plant them today, we will never have trees.  We can dwell on the time we missed, or embrace the opportunity today!  So today… we are planting trees!

One of the trees we have chosen to plant it an oak tree.  Much to my surprise, even tree enthusiasts have tried to sway us away from the long term investment of the slow growing oak, particularly if we are uncertain if we will be in this house forever.  If we approach life with this philosophy… we are missing the mark on our purpose here.  We are here on this earth for only a short while, this is our temporary residence.  We must embrace an eternal perspective when choosing what seeds to plant and water.  While we are here, we are called to create beauty and to leave a lasting mark for future generations.  Your temporary impact has eternal rewards!  Plant the oak tree! 

As with trees, the best time to teach children about gratitude is today.  Don’t dwell over missed opportunities. Yes, we could have started 5 years ago, but the next best time is now.  There are ways you reinforce gratitude daily with your children, you know what they are.  You are doing a good job.  That little sapling is growing up to be a mighty oak.  Just stick with it.  Instilling gratitude in children is indeed a long-term commitment with eternal rewards!

My hope is to both encourage you and equip you with practical tools you can use in your home during this season of Thanksgiving and throughout the year. Join me in focusing on and magnify thanksgiving in our homes! 

 

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thess 5:16-18)

 

What you can do (open links for attached lessons)

  1. Memorize Psalm 100.  This is a beautiful Psalm you can spend the month of November focusing on with your family.  Our family loves this song version of this Psalm.  
  2. Gratitude leaves 
  3. Gratitude Journals 
  4. Meal Time Praises and Prayers –  This is a family tradition of ours, and is basically what it sounds like… During our dinner prayer we have each person say a praise and a prayer as we go around the table.  It creates a daily environment of thanksgiving in our home, and also teaches little ones how to pray. 
  5. Other gratitude resources:
    1. Not Consumed
    2.   ABC Jesus Loves Me (for younger children)

 

 

 

Leaves of Gratitude

As the cold November wind blows the final leaves from the trees, the absence of the leaves allows us to see beyond, to what we couldn’t see before, and our vision becomes enhanced.  Similarly, the November wind of thankfulness gusts through our lives, and enhances our vision.  Gratitude by nature enhances vision by adjusting focus.  I have heard it said many times, “What we focus on, we magnify”.  November blesses us with the opportunity to focus on, and therefore, to magnify gratitude.  To read full post on Creating an Environment of Thanksgiving in your home, click here.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thess 5:16-18)

Every November I bring out the gratitude leaves in our home.  Years ago a friend introduced me to this concept and we have been using it ever since.  It has taken on a few different forms over the years, but the underlying message is the same, thanksgiving – grateful acknowledgement of all we have been blessed with.  There are so many versions of this concept on the internet – you can search and be inspired for hours.  While the inspiration of the internet is a huge gift, it can also lead to lots of inspiration without a lot of action.  Set an action plan for yourself.  Anytime you start is great, just get started. 

Gratitude Leaves and Display Options

Cut leaves

These leaves will be used to write messages of gratitude on, throughout the month of November. 

Amount needed: To have enough leaves for the entire month of November, plan on 1 leaf/person/day (~30 leaves x number of people in your house).   You can cut about 9-12 leaves per sheet of paper, so you need about 3, 8×10, sheets of paper of person.  You can share leaves if you write small. 

Paper: any colored or patterned paper will do. You can use a combination of yellow, red, orange and brown if you like. This year I am using patterned paper I purchased years ago (I found it in the scrapbooking aisle at one of the big-box stores).

Cutting:  I use EK Tools Paper Punch, Large, Maple Leaf.  It makes the process much quicker for 100+ leaves. You can also cut leaves by hand, just keep the pattern simple.  

Maple leaf paper punch

 

 

Leaf display options – choose an option that works best for you. I have done them all.  We are not striving for perfection here – just gratitude.  Do what works for you this season.  

Gratitude Tree (OPTION 1): scroll down for other options 

A Tree of Gratitude

STEP 1: Download GRATITUDE TREE FILE HERE: GRATITUDE TREE

STEP 2: Save PDF file onto your computer.  

STEP 3: Print images (12 sheets of paper)

  • Option 1: Print images onto brown cardstock
  • Option 2: Print images onto white cardstock to paint brown yourself.  

STEP 4: Assemble printed documents.   

  • Note: Start assembly right to left, and then proceed top to bottom.  We taped the paper together with masking tape on the back, and filled in the paper overlap on the front with glue (see photo).  

Gratitude Tree Assembly, step 1

 

Fully Assembled Gratitude Tree

 

Glue paper overlap on front of tree to create smooth seams

STEP 5: Paint your tree (if using white cardstock).  If you chose to use brown cardstock you will omit this step and proceed to STEP 6 (ASSEMBLY).

We painted the tree brown, and then we mixed brown and black paint, and used a sponge to add texture to the tree.

craft sponge used for texture

STEP 6: DISPLAY

To display tree, attach to wall or surface of your choice.  We used blue painters tape to attach it to the wall.  Masking tape leaves a sticky residue behind and is not recommended.  

That’s it, you are done and ready to hang your leaves. 

STEP 7: LEAF ATTACHMENT

I will be using the same blue painters tape to attach my leaves.  Blue painters tape is easy to remove and will allow us to use our tree year after year, with proper storage. 

 

Gratitude WALL (OPTION 2): 

Choose a wall or window where you can attach rows of loosely tied jute twine.  I didn’t intentionally capture a photo of our wall last year, but it was in the background of another picture… so this is the best I have for you.  Hopefully it gives you the idea. We used jute twine and clothespins

 

Gratitude Jar (OPTION 3): 

Have a clear glass jar to collect gratitude leaves in.  Simple and beautiful. 

 

Gratitude Tree, Branches (OPTION 4):

We used this option a few years ago, but with 6 people in our family, we simply had too many leaves for our branches.  I do however plan on using something similar on our Thanksgiving table this year for guests to fill out and enjoy.    

 

 

What to do at the end of November?

I sort the leaves by person and we read over them again.  We then glue them into our gratitude journals and date the page.  These leaves have become a fun keepsake. I try to encourage my little’s to write their own leaves because I treasure their sweet handwriting as much as their simple gratitude.  With that said, I also want this to be a fun memory for them, so if they don’t want to write, I simply do the writing for them.  This is not a lesson in handwriting, it is a lesson in gratitude.  I have to remind the multi-tasker in myself to stay focused.  

 

Blessings to you and your family this holiday season.  May the blessing of gratitude overwhelm your hearts this Thanksgiving season and throughout the year.  

 

Gratitude Journals

I mentioned Gratitude Journals in my post Creating an Environment of Thanksgiving in our Homes. You can read the full post here:  http://homespunsugar.com/creating-an-environment-of-thanksgiving-in-our-homes/.

One of our favorite ways to focus on gratitude throughout the year is a simple gratitude journal. We each write what we are thankful for as a regular part of our routine.  We have been doing this since my children were very little and it has become such a treasure. Don’t hesitate to sit down with them and either write or draw (I do both) in your journal too.  Gratitude is something we all need more of in our lives.  And don’t forget, gratitude is caught not taught, so be sure to allow them to see you being thankful too!

For my younger kids (elementary ages) I use this journal:

Strathmore Kids 100 Series Youth Story Drawing Book, 8-1/2 x 11 Inches, White, 30 Sheets. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0022JOAZI/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_image?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Here are some sample journal entries my children have done.

Hot Air Balloon Festival.

 

Daddy pushing me on the swing.

 

For myself and older children I use this journal:

Canson XL Series Mix Paper Pad, Heavyweight, Fine Texture, Heavy Sizing for Wet and Dry Media, Side Wire Bound, 60 Sheets, 7″X10″.  https://www.amazon.com/Canson-Heavyweight-Texture-Sizing-Sheets/dp/B0039UMRMW/ref=sr_1_4?crid=1O2C0982A86A4&dchild=1&keywords=multimedia+sketchbook&qid=1603909922&s=arts-crafts&sprefix=multimedia%2Carts-crafts%2C201&sr=1-4.  

Summer in Bloom

Get your journals and start today.  You will be glad you did!