joy

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!  I love Christmas!  If you know my Mama, you would know why.  You cannot grow up under her wing and not LOVE Christmas.  She loves the lights and luminarios, the boxes and bows, the carols and cookies.  Christmas releases a joy within her that is unmatched.  She is unabashedly head over heels for Christmas.

Friends, let me tell you about my Mama.  She is beautiful.  Queen Esther beautiful.  She is joyful, kind, loving, tender, humble, selfless and patient.  There is always sunshine in her smile.  A sunshine that isn’t dependent upon her circumstances, or simply the result of a trial free life.  Joy is a choice she makes day after day, and the sunshine that pours out of her is a result of that joy.  Joy is her supernatural (Neh 8:10), superhero strength.  Trials of life do not have the authority to triumph over joy.  If the trials of life could dilute her joy, it would have been watered down by now.  Her joy is full strength and authentic!  Joy is not the absence of trials, but rather the absence of allowing those trials to define you.  Joy is our secret weapon that makes us victorious over the trials of life. The source of joy is faith, hope and peace.

Do not sorrow, for the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Neh 8:10, NKJV).

In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world.” [My conquest is accomplished, My victory abiding.] (John 16:33, AMP)

This beautiful lady with the sunshine in her smile is also an amazing teacher.  The greatest lessons I have learned from her have simply been through observation of who she is.   She taught me to love, and to have faith and hope, by the simple way she lives her life.  She is quiet about her faith, but her faith isn’t quiet, because her joy isn’t quiet.   Her joy is uncontainable (Rom 15:13).  If you have ever been to a football game with her, you have experienced her joy first hand (especially when my brother was playing).  Cowbell in one hand and pom-pom in the other… She’s got spirit!  How ‘bout you?!  Her joy is a radiant reflection of her faith.

Now may God, the inspiration and fountain of hope, fill you to overflowing with uncontainable joy and perfect peace as you trust in him. And may the power of the Holy Spirit continually surround your life with his super-abundance until you radiate with hope! (Roman 15:13, TPT)

In 2004 she encountered a trial that would attempt to not only steal her joy, but her life. It was Easter weekend and my parents were visiting my Aunt and Uncle in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.  As they were driving to church that Resurrection Sunday, my Mom was overtaken with fatigue and nausea.  She knew exactly what is was because it had happened just months prior (on a much smaller scale), when she was diagnosed with a spontaneous cerebral hemorrhage.  In laymen’s terms, her brain was bleeding.  The first bleed resolved on its own, the second would require surgery.

The hemorrhage may have caught us off guard, but God was prepared.  He had everything lined up in a way that only He could.   God had always walked with her, and today was no exception.  He was right there that day, and so was the Cleveland Clinic… Yes, she was only four minutes from the world renowned Cleveland Clinic!   And on call that Easter morning “just happened” to be one of the top brain surgeons.  Without a minute to spare, she was taken into the operating room for emergency brain surgery.

At the time, I was living in a Colorado mountain town working as a Dietitian, and my little brother was wrapping up his final year at New Mexico State University.  That morning as I was getting ready to attend Easter Service on the ski mountain, I opened an Easter package from my Mama.  She had sent me the CD In My Daughter’s Eyes, by Martina McBride.  It is a beautiful song about the love between a mother and a daughter who see each other as the hero.    As I scramble out the door, I hear her cheery voice in the distance as she leaves a message on my answering machine…  “Happy Easter sweetie!!”, and she proceeds with singing the song “Here comes Peter Cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail, hippity, hoppity, Easter’s on its way…”.   She LOVES Easter too!

As the sound of Peter Cottontail trails off in the distance, I head to the mountain knowing my mama loves me, and knowing that in her eyes I am a hero.  As I am skiing through the lift line my cell phone rings.  It is my dad.  He quickly catches me up on the events of the last ten minutes of his life, and he tells me to briefly talk to my mom before she goes into the operating room.

I rode the lift up, I didn’t know what else to do.  I needed Easter service and Jesus that morning – now perhaps more than ever.  As I stood there among the crowd of skiers under the warm April sun, surrounded by snow covered pine trees, with majestic mountains towering overhead, I was overwhelmed by the handiwork of the Creator who with one utterance created the scene around me through His mighty power.  The same God who came at Christmas, and died and rose on Easter over 2000 years ago.  We were celebrating Him that morning!!  Everything Jesus accomplished on the cross and through His resurrection mattered now.  That Easter morning on that snowy mountain, I needed the resurrection power of Jesus.  Jesus knew I would call on Him that day.  He knew that when He died on the cross, and that is what made him be able to endure it.  On that dark day in history, He saw a glimpse of this moment in time, and it made it all worthwhile.  He did it for her, He did it for me, and… He did it for you.  That is what Easter is all about!  The love of a Savior that was sent to rescue us!  That is the good news!!  Christmas and Easter should give us great joy!!

She was finally out of surgery and recovering in the ICU.  She was unresponsive, but she was alive.  I don’t think I ever thought I would lose her; after all, she had taught me how to have faith and hope.  Besides, she had never given up before, I knew she wouldn’t give up now.   I got a flight out the next day to Ft. Lauderdale.  Before I left I was talking with my Uncle in Texas, her Sister’s husband, and he said “be sure to play some Christmas carols for her, she will need them”.  So that Easter Sunday, I packed my Walkman and a Christmas CD.  The following day with Christmas carols in tow, I boarded a small plane and flew to Florida.

You can never prepare for a moment like this.  You just have to walk into it with courage and take it one step at a time.  There was my beautiful, hopeful and joyful Mama, lying there, connected to machines and unresponsive.  I sat with her, I talked to her, I cried for her, I cried for me.  I knew she was still there, and as I held her hand and talked to her, I trusted she heard me.  Her hero had arrived.  Silly Mama – she’s the hero not me.  But today, I will be brave.

I pulled out my Walkman, placed the headphones on her ears, and turn on the carols.  Friends, let me tell you about the power of Christmas!!  That Monday morning in April following Easter Sunday, Christmas bells were ringing in that hospital room, and they brought tears to her eyes!  As the tears streamed down her face, Christmas whispered to my heart it’s all going to be okay.  She knew it and I knew it.  Christmas isn’t a season, it’s a person.  The reason she loves Christmas is because it is her strength, her joy, her hope and her peace…   How can you not be ecstatic about celebrating Christmas!

She slowly woke from her slumber over the next few weeks.  It was then that we knew it was going to be a long journey.  I could only stay for a short while, I had to get back to a new job, a new house, and a life that didn’t get put hold – though it felt like it should have.  Even my Dad eventually had to get back home.  He also had a job and a house and life that wasn’t on hold.  We left her in the amazing hands of my Aunt Connie and Uncle Joe.  Aunt Connie did drop everything for her so she could love her back to health.  God had placed her right where she needed to be that Easter Sunday.

After spending over three weeks in the ICU, she was eventually discharged to a rehab facility where she would learn everything over.  How to eat, how to walk, how to talk, how to write.  She had no joy!  She wanted out. She hated it there.  It took tough love to leave her there.  When she begged to come home, Aunt Connie was strong enough to say no.  And when it was time to bring her home, Aunt Connie was strong enough to say yes.  After months in the rehab hospital, Aunt Connie and Uncle Joe took her home to their house where they continued to nurse her back to health.  They continued to drive her for outpatient rehab, but being “home” was where her real progress began.  Love can often do what medicine cannot.

Recovery continued to be a long process for my Mama.   She was a funny thing that first year.   She said some of the most off the wall things and loved nicknames.  Her Chico’s Tacos antics would make us roll with laughter.  Oh how she craved her favorite El Paso tacos “in the little red boats with the cheap cheese”.  As for the nicknames, she called her nurses Bangies, Uncle Joe was officially Giuseppe (his Italian name) and the beloved Aunt Connie became Connie Mae.   Other than the Bangies, those were terms of endearment.   At the time she was not endeared to the Bangies, even little Miss. Sunshine couldn’t express her gratitude for all that the nurses did for her.  Brain damage is like that.  With that said, her gratitude for Connie Mae was unquenchable.  Oh how familiar we became with the phrase “I like Connie Mae a lot!” and she did.  She always had!  Who better than a best friend to love you back to health.  Love and joy are powerful remedies.  Connie Mae had both and she never hesitated to share them.

Aunt Connie and my Mom have always been two peas in a pod.   If you know my mom, you know my Aunt Connie.  They are sisters by marriage and best friends by choice.  While we were growing up together in El Paso, Texas, our families were inseparable.  Life and work eventually moved their family to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.  It was a devastating move for both our families.  Years later, life and work moved my parents to Tampa, Florida.   Though four hours apart, God had weaved their paths closer together again, this time in Florida.  He knew what He was doing all along.

Six months had passed since that Easter Sunday.  The first day of autumn had arrived in sunny Florida.  Connie Mae woke my Mom up that morning with pumpkin pie and fall decorations!  They speak the same language.  It’s a secret joy code.  The bible tells us that a joyful heart is good medicine.  Pumpkin pie and fall decorations were the kind of medicine she needed, the kind of medicine Connie Mae knew how to give – joy wrapped up in love.

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. (Prov 17:22, NASB)

While my mom lived with Connie Mae, my Dad was home in Tampa with his Mom.  They were taking care of each other.  My dad suddenly found himself having to do laundry, and cook meals, and work, and drive the four hours across the state EVERY single weekend to see my mom.  His Mom was there for him. She cooked.  She cleaned.  She did the wash.  We are never too old to need our Mama’s.

After almost a year of traveling back and forth to Ft. Lauderdale, my Dad made his final trip alone.  This time he was returning with my Mom.  Leaving Connie Mae was a big darn deal.  It is like leaving for college for the first time.  She was going to be off on her own, away from the person who nursed her back to health with joy and love.  The woman who left Tampa didn’t return to Tampa.  The woman who returned walked differently, talked differently, moved more slowly, was learning to write with her left hand, was no longer able to drive… The journey continued.

That spring, she was back home and watching March Madness.  Her love for sports is right up there with her love for decorating.  This particular year she was inspired to combine the two by decorating with basketballs.  That was a first, even for her.  It was time to celebrate life again!  Every moment of every day there was joy to be found!  If having basketballs displayed artistically throughout the house would spark joy – then basketballs she would use.  If it takes basketballs, use basketballs!  Find what brings you joy and use it!

As spring was blossoming into summer that year, my little brother was also preparing for a new season in his life.  He was graduating from college, the same college both my parents and I graduated from.  We were excited to celebrate with him as we all returned to our old stomping ground.  My Mama was getting stronger each day and she was ready to take the trip back home to the desert southwest.

With school pride displayed in the form of crimson and black balloons, shoe polish and streamers, we seek out his car at the graduation practice.  Time to decorate!  She walks with assistance, her right side lacks coordination, but this woman is armed with streamers and shoe polish and she knows how to use them!   That is right folks!  She decorated because she could!  She decorated because that is what she always did!  She decorated because it brings her joy!  She decorates because she has joy!  Her joy is infectious.  This woman who just beat all the odds is back at it.  Celebrating, decorating, finding joy in each day, and spreading sunshine with her smile.  Was she defeated?  No!  Was it over?  Far from it.  Did she choose joy?  Absolutely. Again and again and again!

Where is she today you ask?  At home in Texas preparing for Christmas with her carols cranking.  Yes, she moved from Florida back to Texas.  This time God moved her closer to my brother and her sister on the southeast side of the state.  No, it’s not the desert southwest, and sorry Mom, there are no Chico’s Tacos, but it’s still Texas with family!  Did she return to Texas the way she left?  No.  She returned with a walker, two hip replacements from multiple falls, grey hairs shining through her golden curls, and a few more laugh lines adorning her beautiful face. Is she ever beautiful!  Stunning really.  I wish I could allow you, with my words, to encounter the joy that she is.  Just the other day my husband in passing smiled and said…. “She is so inspiring.”   I am hosting Christmas this year.  She will show up with the biggest smile on her face, a hug that takes your breath away, and a joy that lingers long after she leaves.  This is her season!  Christmas is here!

She loves Christmas unabashedly.  The good news is that the feeling is mutual… Christmas loves her unabashedly too.  Nothing can separate her from the love of Christmas (Rom 8:34)!  Christmas adores her, and me, and you!  Does her story end here?  Far from it.  This is just the beginning.  As I write this, I hear Christmas whisper to my heart that this is only the introduction, the introduction to the most wonderful testimony of the love of Christmas.  There is so much more to come…  CHRISTMAS IS COMING!  HE IS COMING!  There is a great unveiling taking place in this season we are in.  We are about to see Christmas show up in all His glory and splendor.  To quote the holy spirit inspired words of the apostle Paul,  “I am convinced that any suffering we have endured is less than nothing compared to the magnitude of glory (radiant beauty) that is about to be unveiled within us.  The entire universe is standing on tiptoe yearning to see the unveiling of God’s glorious sons and daughters!”.   We ain’t seen nothing yet!  Christmas Himself is the greatest gift we freely receive.  He is continually praying for our triumph (Rom 8:34), and continually weaving together every detail of our lives, to create a beautiful tapestry, that when complete will tell the story of His perfect love He lavished upon us (Rom 8:28).

“¹⁸ I am convinced that any suffering we endure is less than nothing compared to the magnitude of glory that is about to be unveiled within us.  ¹⁹ The entire universe is standing on tiptoe, yearning to see the unveiling of God’s glorious sons and daughters!” (Rom 8:18-19, TPT)

³⁴ Who then is left to condemn us? Certainly not Jesus, the Anointed One! For he gave his life for us, and even more than that, he has conquered death and is now risen, exalted, and enthroned by God at his right hand. So how could he possibly condemn us since he is continually praying for our triumph?  ³⁵ Who could ever separate us from the endless love of God’s Anointed One? Absolutely no one! For nothing in the universe has the power to diminish his love toward us. Troubles, pressures, and problems are unable to come between us and heaven’s love. (Rom 8:34-35, TPT)

So we are convinced that every detail of our lives is continually woven together to fit into God’s perfect plan of bringing good into our lives, for we are his lovers who have been called to fulfill his designed purpose. (Rom 8:28, TPT)

Christmas is coming!  Are you ready for Him?   Christmas is drawing near?  Are you allowing Him in?  Let us prepare our hearts to be a place that welcomes our Savior!  Will we make room in the Inn of our hearts for Him to finding a resting place (Luke 2:7).  Take time for the One who is knocking at the door of your heart, He longs to be let in (Rev 3:20).   This will indeed be the greatest gift you give this Christmas season, whether you are inviting Him in again or for the first time.   Take time right now, in this moment, to respond to His knocking.   Whisper tenderly to him “Jesus, may I have the honor to welcome you into the Inn of my heart!  I will give you a resting place.   Thank you for coming on that Christmas long ago.  You sacrificed everything for me!  Come in!  Come in!  This Inn is open!”

And she gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn. (Luke 2:7, NASB)

²⁰ Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. (Rev 3:20, NKJV)

⁹ because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.  (Rom 10:9, ESV)

I am praying the prayer of Eph 3:14-21 over you this Christmas season:

¹⁴ So I kneel humbly in awe before the Father of our Lord Jesus, the Messiah, ¹⁵ the perfect Father of every father and child in heaven and on the earth. ¹⁶ And I pray that he would unveil within you the unlimited riches of his glory and favor until supernatural strength floods your innermost being with his divine might and explosive power.  ¹⁷ Then, by constantly using your faith, the life of Christ will be released deep inside you, and the resting place of his love will become the very source and root of your life.  ^18–19 Then you will be empowered to discover what every holy one experiences—the great magnitude of the astonishing love of Christ in all its dimensions. How deeply intimate and far-reaching is his love! How enduring and inclusive it is! Endless love beyond measurement that transcends our understanding—this extravagant love pours into you until you are filled to overflowing with the fullness of God!  ²⁰ Never doubt God’s mighty power to work in you and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than your greatest request, your most unbelievable dream, and exceed your wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for his miraculous power constantly energizes you.  ²¹ Now we offer up to God all the glorious praise that rises from every church in every generation through Jesus Christ—and all that will yet be manifest through time and eternity. Amen! (Eph 3:14-21, TPT)

Christmas and Easter collided together in that ICU room years ago.  That day we were reminded of why Jesus came and why He died.  He did it for her, and He did it for me, and He did it for you.  May you hear the Christmas bells ringing and be reminded of that life changing truth today.  Jesus’ birth makes all the difference, and His death makes us different.  

As I bring this story to a close this morning, the sound of little voices singing Rudolph at the top of their lungs echoes throughout the house.  My children are awake and they are full of Christmas joy!  It is as if God is whispering the closing for me.  “He’ll go down in history!”…